Random Girl With Internet Access

I believe I am what they call "bleeding heart"

Archive for the tag “stupidity”

“Am I a …” Solving Everyone’s Probelms

I decided it would be fun to type, “Am I a/an” followed by a letter into Google, choose the suggested question I feel most confidant to answer and help the word solve its problems! So here goes…

“Am I an Atheist?”

Considering the fact that you are Googling it, I would say you are an agnostic.

“Am I a Bad Person?”

If you are pondering it probably not. The fact that you are worried that you are a bad person shows that you feel remorse for any of the bad things that you have done, so despite the fact that you may have made some mistakes I think you are fundamentally a good person.

At this point so many of the “c’s” are hilarious that I’m going to do a few per letter if it takes my fancy, this is my blog after all

“Am I a Canadian citizen?”

If you were I think you would know about it, considering that you would either have been born a Canadian or would have gone though a long and difficult proses to become one.  So I’m going to say no to that.

“Am I a Communist?”

If you believe that all wealth should be held in commune (i.e. Owned by everyone), then, yes you are a communist. If you only think some things should be in commune then you are a socialist. If you think there should be no ownership or authority at all then you are an anarchist. If you are worried about being a communist/socialist then Google “red scare” and find out why people have such an issue with us.

“Am I a California resident?”

Go to your house. Turn on a GPS or map app on a smartphone. If you are in California then you are a California resident.

“Am I a Demigod?”

Yes, yes you are.

“Am I an Evil Person?”

Depends how you define “evil”

“Am I a Feminist?”

“Feminist” is a pretty large umbrella term so if you are Googling it then you probably are. Welcome to the club!

“Am I a first time buyer?”

Well have you bought before?


“Am I a good friend quiz”

If it troubles you then you probably are

“Am I a Hipster?”

No, hipsters may never call themselves hipsters?

“Am I an idiot?”

Probably not there are many different types of intelligence and you probably possess at least one

“Am I a Jew?”

Ask your mum. (I would just like to point out that further down the list was a request for “am a I Jew quiz”)

“Am I a kleptomaniac?”

How did you get a hold of the computer you Googled that on?

“Am I a Libertarian?”

Imagine you’re a lifeguard an you see someone drowning. Would you help them? If so then no. However if you would expect the water, the other swimmers or the drowning person themselves to sort it out, then you might just be a libertarian.

“Am I a medium?”

If you are too small for a large but to large for a small then I would highly suspect that you are a medium.

“Am I a Miss or a Ms?”

Whichever you like best.

“Am I a Nihilist?”

Was there really any point in Googling that?

“Am I not pretty enough?”

I disagree with the premise of your question.


“Am I a one per center?”

Statistically its unlikely, but its not being in the one per cent which is important, it is how you react to being in the one per cent.

“Am I an organ donor?”

I don’t know whom you should ask about this but I doubt its Google.

“Am I a Panda or a Dog”

Either way I’m impressed that you can type.

“Am I quitter?”
Quitting is an action not a character trait. Despite the fact that coaches and teachers will endlessly repeat “winners never quit and quitters never win”, this is an overgeneralization. Sometimes quitting is an integral part of winning. For example a General may choose to concede a battle, which s/he is loosening, in order to preserve the lives of soldiers to win the war. Or an author might stop writing one book in order to start on a better idea. Giving up on everything will reap no rewards, but neither will sticking with everything. You need to find a balance.


“Am I a recluse?”

If you’re wondering then you’re probably somewhere on the spectrum but bare in mind you get to decide weather you are going to be a recluse or not.

“Am I a stalker?”

If you need to ask, you’re treading a dangerous line.

“Am I tomboy?”

Don’t try to slot your personality into a shiny box. The box isn’t real, it wont make you happy and it’s a waste of time.

“Am I a unicorn?”


“Am I a unicorn quiz”

Oh my … Seriously?!

Am I a virgin”

I’m speaking from a place of little experience but I’d say it really depends what you define as sex. “Virginity” seems to me like a social construct coming from an era when women were seen as property. A sort of way of saying “I have one woman here … unused!”. The way we see the loss virginity is also very hetronormative, most people see it as “penis in vagina” but that basically implies that lesbians, gays and intersex people can never loose their virginity. Witch is stupid. So I’ll say it’s arbitrary. I once heard someone say, “Virginity is a concept invented by men, who thought that their penises were so powerful that they could fundamentally change who a woman is”

“Am I a writer?”

If you want to be one then probably. I’m sure you can at least grow into one.

“Am I a wolf?”

I haven’t posted them all because it would get boring but the number of people wondering what species they are is starting to concern me. I think if you are using Google you are at least part of the Ape family.

Only one thing came up for x and I’m not entirely sure what it means so I’m going to skip it

“Am I a YouTube partner?”
You have to sign a contract- you would know

“Am I a zombie?”
You might be a metaphorical zombie, if you spend all you’re time on your phone or the Internet or watching TV

End notes: There you go, I did realise around “R” that I should have gone for a more open type of question but it was too far gone by then. I was seriously struck by the number of people who wanted the Internet to tell them what their religion or political ideology is or indeed where they lived. I was tempted with all of these but it would have become boring considering that there was one for almost every letter. All I can say to these is, if you don’t know what religion you are then you’re not a strong enough believer for it to even matter, you can probably ask your next door neighbour about where you live and as for political ideology- this should help – http://www.politicalcompass.org/test. I was waaaaaaay down in the bottom left corner. 


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